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REALISING I WAS GAY

Feck I think I was about 6 or 7 when I realized that I liked guys. playing wrestling with mates showed the tell tale signs. Every time we had a grapple or hold down I sprang a hardon my wee Peter just jumped to attention. I knew this was wrong I knew that it should not happen but it also gave me a great feeling inside. So I kept my secret to myself and wrestled with as many guys as I could as often as I could. It was only a feeling I knew it was dirty and wrong. I did not know why I just knew it had to be my secret. By the time I was 11 I was wanking playing with my Peter. Again I did not know it was wanking I just knew it felt good playing with it and that it was dirty and wrong but fuck it felt good and I think I became addicted after the very first time.
I have two older brothers John is 3 years older and Jamie is 18 months older than me they both shared a room and I had a converted cupboard as a bedroom. I was twelve and just started Secondary School I came home from school and went straight to my room to get changed out of my School uniform and I decided to have a little play with Peter I had started cumming about two months earlier although it was only little spurts it was fucking amazing. So there I am lying on the bed god only knows who I was thinking about probably some guy in my class or one of my older brothers mates. I was stroking away like a right little wanker when John my oldest brother barged into the room.
He was 15 at the time and a right pain in the arse
I tried to pull my boxers up but I got caught exposed.
" You little pervert wanking your wee maggot Jamie ,Jamie he called out this wee cunt is wanking in here"
My other brother Jamie came into the room
" who were yea wanking to wee man Jamie asked "
"ah wisnae a promise he is just making it up"
I was not telling lies I had been called a wanker many times I had called people wankers thousands of times but I did not have a clue what wanking or a wanker was. I probably thought that I was the only guy in the world who played with his Peter.
I knew I should not be doing it but I never knew that what I was doing had a name. They both teased me although John was the worse he just loved being cruel to me. Jamie went along with it probably just to keep on John’s side. They threatened to tell mum when she got home that I was wanking unless I tidied up their room as mum had warned them to get it tidied before she came in from work.
I agreed to do it I did not want mum knowing about my dirty little secret. Of course I never stopped playing with Peter but I made sure I put something behind my room door so that I got a warning if anyone was coming in.
I was 13 the first time I saw another guy wanking. I was dogging school with one of my class mates it was a horrible wet day so we went to an old run down Farm house that was due for demolition to take shelter from the rain. We found an old scud book in the house and sat side by side looking at the naked women in the book. I sprang a hardon and so did my mate I honestly don’t know who was first I just remember both of us had our cocks out and began wanking His eyes were fixed on the magazine mine were fixed on his cock. I was fascinated by it his was not any bigger than mine but fuck I so wanted to touch it.
He shot his load and I came right after him. We put our cocks away wiped our spunk on the wall then set fire to the mag. I left that old house in love. This was probably the first time I had ever actually ever thought about touching another guys cock. I could not get the thought out of my head that night I wanked like crazy but now I had a clear image in my head. I wanted to wank off another guy I wanted to touch another guys cock.
I was and still am a mad Wanker at least twice a day every day and my interest in other guys cocks took over my every thought. I tried hard to think of girls when I wanked but the wank went on and on forever but the minute I thought about a guy I would shoot my load within minutes. Of course I did not want to think like this. There was nothing about me that showed outwardly that I was a poof. I was not in any way camp. I fought often, I played football, and I was forever in trouble with the school I got my fair share of girls was even convinced a few times that I was in love with girls. But in my head it was always guys that gave me that tingling feeling inside.
When I was 14 my dad bought a caravan (Holiday Trailer ) that was permanently sited beside loch Lomond. The first weekend we were there I met a guy who the minute I saw I fell in love with. His name is Barry his parents also owned a caravan on the site me and my brother Jamie were kicking a ball about. I hit the ball a bit too hard and it went over the fence outside Barry's Caravan he was sitting on the porch and handed the ball back to me. We sort of started chatting he asked if we were renting or had we bought a caravan,.
Some people rent out their caravans as holiday lets when they are not using them to help pay the site fees. I told him that my dad had just bought it and that this was the first time we had been down. He warned us that the site manager would complain if we played ball games near the caravans and told me that the best place was the spare ground further down the park. He offered to show us where to play so the three of us Me, Jamie and Barry went down to the play area for a kick about. Barry was 15 at that time the same age as our Jamie. He came from Dundee another city in Scotland probably about 60 miles from Glasgow. He was about 5ft 11ins tall skinny longish black hair that hung over his face I would say good looking a happy guy very easy going and sexy as fuck. We messed about with the ball for a little while then he had to go back to his Caravan for his dinner but we agreed to meet up again that evening at 6.30 and he would take us to the games room and introduce us to his weekend friends the kids of the other families who spent most of their weekends on the camp site. I was sorry to see him go fuck I so wanted to Cum with him I could hardly take my eyes off him as he walked towards his Caravan.

Barry went to get fed. Me and my Brother Jamie went back to our Caravan to get some food and get changed into our tracksuits we had been wearing shorts and tee shirts during the day. Just over an hour later we were ready to go (Probably the longest hour of my life at that time)
Jamie wanted to go straight to the games room but I convinced him to wait on Barry coming out of his Caravan. Jamie suggested that Barry might already be in the games room but I knew he wasn’t I had been watching out the window of our van almost every second since we got back inside. The slightest shadow passing outside caught my attention just incase my Barry went past. Fuck talk about love at first sight or is that lust? We did not have long to wait Barry came out of his caravan and fuck he looked stunning his dark hair still wet he had on a light blue La’coste tracksuit and white Nike trainers he was my vision of a sex God. As he walked towards us his cheeky grin acknowledging that he had saw us. Although I am not sure how I noticed it as my eyes were fixed on his lower body checking for any sign of swing in the bulge department of his trackies and I am sure I saw what I was looking for.
The games room was probably only about 40 meters from our Caravan as soon as we walked in Barry went to a black board and put our names up for pool. There were only two pool tables in the room and the rules were that the winner stayed on there was maybe 5 or 6 names up already waiting for a game. there were a few other teenagers already in the games room and Barry seamed to know most of them he introduced us to the ones he knew they all seamed ok people although one girl called Anna nearly got pushed on her arse when she put her arms around my Barry's waist and planted a kiss on his cheek. Grrr I was not happy about that ( God looking back I wonder if i made it obvious)
It was clear right away that there was a kind of snobbery on the site this was a group of kids who's parents owned a caravan they had their own wee gang and one off renters were not welcome. We hung around the games room playing video games and table tennis until we got our game of pool.
Shit when Barry was on the table I was transfixed my eyes were striping him naked and molesting him in my head. At one point he lifted his knee up on to the table to get a better shot on the ball this pulled his trackies tight and I was sure I could see the shape of his cock through the tight thin material I had to divert my attention before I sprung a hardon.

About 8pm we left the games room to walk in to the village it was about a 3 mile walk but it was the only place you could buy some alcohol. Me and Jamie had clubbed together to buy half an ounce of hash ( Solid cannabis) before we came down. So before we set off on the trek to the village we had went behind the games room and built a couple of joints to smoke on the way. The fact that we had hash seemed to score us extra points with the gang as although most of them smoked it we were the only ones who had any.
When we got to the village it was suggested that we all club our money together to buy alcohol rather than each trying to get served with a small amount. There were 9 of us 6 guys and 3 girls ranging in age from about 14 to 17 years old The oldest guy in the Company was a guy called Terry although he was only 17 he was massive he must have been about 6foot 4 inches tall a big heavy guy and looked older than he was but a bit of a numb nut to be honest it was obvious that although he was the oldest he was the pick on boy of the gang. We all chipped in some cash to the kitty and told Terry to buy a pack of cigarettes then as much Lager and cider that he could get for the money. One of the girls Emma went into the shop with Terry and they came out about 10 minutes later with 3 bulging carrier bags of drink.
We all then headed down to the beach and walked back along towards the camp site until we reached a wooded area probably about a mile away from the Site. It was obvious from the litter that this was a regular drinking den that had been used many times before. The bags unpacked there were 24 cans of lager and 4 litres of cider, some plastic cups to drink from it was a proper little party. My brother Jamie built a few joints as we sat chatting and drinking. To be honest and not to sound big headed I would say that Me and Jamie were probably a bit rougher than these guys were used to hanging around with. Most of the gang were what I would describe as Snobs middle class nice house nice car families from nice areas. We came from a housing scheme (A housing estate owned by the government and the houses rented out to the tenants at affordable rents) it was obvious that we were a bit more rough and tumble I think most of the gang were a bit wary of us probably even a bit impressed with our exaggerated stories of fighting and theft and sexual exploits
All in all it was a pretty good night the drink and drugs relaxing everyone we were all in good spirits. I was sat beside Barry infact we were sat on the same rock our bodies touching every time he moved he sent shock waves of lust through me at one point I went into the trees for a piss and Barry came to join me we both stood there talking and pissing side by side I glanced at his cock although his hand was covering most of it I got to see a little bit I stole a few swatches at it I was getting a semi .
as he shook the dregs holding his cock from the base I got to see almost his full cock for about 2 seconds.
I wanted him so bad and i am sure that if I had known him better I would have offered to shake it dry for him of course it would have been said in a joking manner just to test his reaction.
When we got back to the main group our Jamie was sucking the face off the girl Emma who had went into the Shop with Terry and Anna the girl who had kissed Barry in the games room was Standing against a tree being kissed by another guy Called Rob
I was delighted to see this I thought that maybe her and Barry might have been going out with each other Now that I knew she did not have claim to him I could cancel my plans to take a hit out on her.

By about 11pm the drink was all finnished although none of us were drunk to the point of falling down we were all a bit merry and we headed back towards the camp site. I acted a little drunker than I was in a ploy to get closer to Barry. I put my arm around his shoulder hugging him close to me as we walked telling him what a great guy he was and how I was glad we had met him
"No problem mate Good Guys Together eh " he replied as he put his arm around my shoulder and we staggered back to the site the best of buds my cock growing stronger and longer with every step.

Our Caravan had one double room and two singles and a sofa bed in the living area. Dad had the double Me and Jamie had a single. I was desperate to get to bed not that I was tired I just had a head full of Barry and needed some relief fast. Jamie sat with Dad watching TV. Thankfully the beds in the caravan were fixed beds so I did not have to worry about bed squeak as the images of Barry naked with a raging hardon flowed through my head. Within minutes of being in my room I had him stripped naked in my mind I could almost feel his soft warm skin against mine our rock hard cocks bouncing off each others my hand worked my cock furiously. Fuck I am sure I let out a groan loud enough to drown out the noise from the TV as I let my load go all over my stomach. I lay for a minute to get my breath back then scooped up a little of my squeeby on my finger and tasted it dreaming that it was Barry's then searched in the dark for my socks to clean up what was left of my mess. I fell asleep satisfied and empty.

I was up pretty early the following morning it must have been about 8.30 am. Although our caravan had a built in shower the tray was leaking and Dad had removed it and was going in to the nearest town to buy a new one that day. So I had to use the campsite showers I pulled on the clothes that I had been wearing the night before stuck on my Flip Flops grabbed a pair of boxers and socks from my bag a towel from the bathroom and headed for a shower. Fuck I m so glad that I did. The first sight I saw when I walked in the door was a cock. This man who I would say was about 30 years old had his towel over his head and face drying his hair and these big fucking hairy balls and cock were bouncing about as he dried himself I froze to the spot my mouth agape as my cock sprung to life. Just as the guy removed the

towel from his head he lifted his foot up on to the bench to dry his feet and legs I swear his big hairy arse was only inches from me. My cock was rock hard by this time I had never expected to see anything like this on the caravan site.
The shower room had four cubicles without doors or anywhere to get changed you had to strip off lay your clothes on a bench fixed to the wall about 5 feet from the showers then go into the shower cubicles. I turned my back to the man and undressed slowly hoping my hardon would go away or the man would dress and go away before I was naked. Until then I thought that I had a big cock and plenty of hair around my balls but seeing that man's cock and balls showed me that I had a lot of growing to do. I counted to three in my head whipped off my boxers and swiftly got in an empty shower cubicle then realised I had not brought any soap or shampoo I felt like a right plonker. I washed down as best I could with just water. all in all I was in the shower about 3 or 4 minutes I got out and began drying myself off another guy came out of one of the other cubicles he was probably about 18 years old I never actually got to see his cock but got a right good look at his arse and dangling balls half dry I pulled on my clean boxers and trackies as fast as I could I did not want him to see my little Peter growing hard again fuck I had saw more real living cock in ten minutes than I had in my whole life. THIS STORY WILL CONTINUE Please comment

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